Further Adventures with Automobiles

The van died recently. I had driven it home from work, parked it, and Jody got in 15 minutes later and, nothing. It turned, but there was no pop. So I called my mechanic, and he said to disconnect the fuel line in the engine box, crank the van and see if anything came out. It showed me the fuel pump wasn't working. That meant dropping the fuel tank to remove the pump. The upside is, it would allow me to fix the gas gauge as well.

So Tuesday night I got everything out tool wise, and figured out how I was going to support the car while I was under it. Pretty much that was my night. Wednesday night I got under it and looked around. There was one quick disconnect, and two bolts to contend with to drop the tank. So I thought. I started in on the first bolt, and knew immediately that it was going to be a process. It took several hours to work that bolt down almost to the end. Then the slip washer broke. That was the end of that night. On Thursday, I knew I'd be cutting. So I bought a small hack saw, because the vehicle's frame is just so that a regular hack saw and my reciprocating saw just wouldn't fit under there. You have to know something. I'm not mechanically inclined. It's not too different from construction, however, different enough that I prefer to pay to have it done. So back under the car I was on Thursday night, handsawing the bolt. In a tight place with the spare tire at my chest, and just enough room to get a one inch stroke with the saw. My shoulders felt it soon enough. And of course every movement rubbed the spare which knocked off dirt which fell on my face, and into my eyes despite my safety glasses. Ah, you say. Yea, yea. I realized it, but not until SATURDAY. Remove the spare! It took me all night to hand saw that one bolt. I had the two gas lines and one brake line to contend with. The other bolt was easier, and that was my mission on Friday night.

I didn't do much on Friday night. By then I had all weekend to work on it. I had a plan. And Saturday morning I set out on that plan.

I noticed quickly that plans change. Change meaning in my case, get delayed. I got the bolt cut, and do you suppose it dropped right out of the strap? Noooooo. It was such a rusty mess that I had to torque and twist and wrestle it out. Not with just one bolt. With both. Finally though, both bolts were history. Needing replacement. Stainless steel came immediately to mind. Now for the quick disconnec...quick discon...disconne...quick(?)...aaaarrrrrggggghhhhh! It was neither quick or disconnected. So (having brilliantly removed the spare tire and having oodles of room and no dirt falling in my face), I decided I was going to mangle off the so-called quick disconnect without damaging the fuel line. Between my hand hack saw, needle nose pliers, and line pliers, I did manage to get the last fuel line disconnected. I walked into the house at noon, on Saturday, to proclaim my victory! I had disconnected three items! Let the fun begin!

Being that my boss is a super guy, as well as running a great business I am happy and proud to be a part of, I had been driving the company truck home at night. I cleaned it out, and did the weekend recycling run of cardboard from a cabinet delivery as a payback. It was the jack in the truck I wanted to hold up the gas tank after I got it free from its rusty chains. It was one of those wheeled hydraulic jacks. Sweet, as my young one would say. And it was doing it's job well. Because now was the time to begin the big drop. Using my construction and fire fighter knowledge to block things for support, I figure I could lower the tank onto blocks so I could get the jack out, and then with the aid of my oldest son, side by side pull out the blocks until the tank was laying flat on the ground. There was one little thing in the way.....

Where does the gas go into your car? Bingo! In a hose that goes UP from the tank to the side panel of the vehicle. Argh. Flat on the ground was out. But the one corner dropped far enough down for me to think with enough twisting and maneuvering I could get the old pump out and the new one in. Fortunately, just a ring that you turn under some flanges holds the pump in. So I took the requisite screwdriver and hammer, and banged it off. Which around a tank of gas, makes me nervous. But it came off! So fast! The home stretch! I could smell the sweet victory of exhaust emanating from a running engine already! It did take a bit of maneuvering. Wet maneuvering. The pump came out and as I turned and twisted the quart of gas it holds poured out all over the ground. My nervousness factor escalated rapidly. I'm a fire fighter. I know how fast and easily gas sets off. Without incident, it came out and I was standing there holding this broken device in hand. By now it's almost dinner time. I had gotten my new bolts and made the recycling run. I could get the new pump in, and then it's just a matter of hook up. No problem! So in goes the new pump, with much gentle turning and twisting. On goes the ring. Now for the electrical hookup...What? They aren't even CLOSE to matching. AARRGGHH! Yes, I called my mechanic in a rather surly mood (which is putting it nicely), for which I later apologized. Guess what I get to do! I get to take the two pumps apart and build one working one from the functioning parts of both! Oh joy! In retrospect, it was a rather educational experience. So after tearing the two apart and making one with the various working parts, I reinserted the pump, and had my son turn the key. Gusher, I tell you what! Whoo! I knew I was on the downhill side now. The reconnecting was a bit smoother. I needed to innovate a few pieces to rehang the straps, and the one gas line was a bit gnarly and hung up the quick connect for a bit. But it all went together. And, there were NO parts left over, and the van started and ran. A little clean-up, and it was all done.

I emerged from the van 12 hours after I got under it. I was tired and sore. I had learned a lot. Some about me, some about the van. But there has got to be an easier way.